


Bearing the Weight of the World

by orphan_account



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Crying, Depression, This is really sad sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-13
Updated: 2014-10-13
Packaged: 2018-02-20 23:57:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 458
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2447819
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Night is a time when everyone can face their pains alone.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Bearing the Weight of the World

During the day, Tsukishima appears tough and mean. His snarky comments and condescending looks are some of the many traits that make the tall male appear unapproachable. He's heard it many times, the comments from his fellow classmates. One ranging from 'he's so cool' to 'what an asshole'. Ignoring tends to do just fine for the blond.

But brushing off these comments isn't easy. It never was. Truth was, he hates being known like this; as the guy who no one wants around. It certainly is lonely on this pedestal he has unwittingly allowed himself to occupy.

If it wasn't for his teammates, if it wasn't for Yamaguchi, he wouldn't be able to handle it.

But even still, they don't truly understand, do they?

In the end, they still see nothing but the facade he has forced upon himself; the one that has, for the longest time, kept him safe and from breaking any further.

Some part of him want to lower his guard; to allow them to see who he truly is. He wants to hope with his team before every match that they'll win; he wants to celebrate with them and laugh with them when it happens, or break down and cry when they don't.

But he can't allow it.

He can't risk it.

Should he be mocked, or should his feelings prove false, would he be able to handle it?

That doesn't mean he hides from them. No one can; he knows this. Bottling it all up would just cause him to explode when he shouldn't.

It would destroy him.

So at night, when all of the house is quiet and his family sleeps, he allows himself this moment of weakness.

And he hates it.

The screams Tsukishima must hide get muffled into his hands, mixing with sobs he deems 'pathetic'. The tears stream and remain untouched as they soak the pillow he lays upon. His fingers tug at the short blond locks of his as he feels nothing but pure shame to himself. Sometimes he allows his blunt nails to scrap against his neck as if trying to allow him freedom of constriction as he tries to remain silent.

He hates himself.

He curls into himself, twisting at his fingers as his sobs die down. His eyes ache as he stares absent-mindedly out the window at the light illuminating from a crack in the curtains. He longs to change, to return to when he was still ok. But he can't. He knows it. And he hates it.

His mind is filled with nothing but disgust and anguish as he drifts into a long deserved slumber.

During the day, Tsukishima appears tough and mean. During the night, he allows himself the weakness he longs for.


End file.
